Individualism and Family

Following a discussion I had today I thought I'd write a longer blog post on this concept. I have had talks with loads of people in my life around various aspects of this so - warning: If you don't want to read a longer post on this just move on now :-)

Basic Unit

One of the things that I have observed with interest when living in different countries is the difference of unit count. The concept that family or network means more in certain societies than others which are more individually based is neither news nor particularly exciting. However, I do have some particular thoughts on what this leads to in a society, which I consider rather hidden and unintentional. Put simple, in Italy, where I used to live, the basic unit of society is family. Family can be large or small, include grandparents and friends, or just be a single mother and her daughter. In Norway, where I am from, the basic unit of society is the individual. It doesn't matter if you are an old man, a divorced woman, a 12-year old kid or a 30 year old married man. Society is constructed around the individual. Disclaimer: This doesn't mean family is not important, or that people don't care about their closest friends - it's just a different unit. Just like it doesn't mean that in Italy people don't look out for themselves, or build their own lives, or have independence.

Relationship with the state:

In my understanding the relationship people have with the state, or government is directly correlated to the unit. Where the family is the basic unit, the loyalty lies with that extended unit - whether it extends even to a village or a region of "us". Where individuals are the unit, the loyalty lies with the state - in the sense that each individual needs the state specifically. Disclaimer: This doesn't mean that in Norway people are more or less patriotic, nor does it mean that Italians don't have a relationship with the state.

Rights and obligations:

One of the consequences I see is the development of the concept of rights of the individual versus the state: The individual has rights versus the collective, which are very strong. While the obligations are often less observed, and there is a development towards less obligations, they are still clear. It is an obligation to pay taxes. To take care of individuals by the state (meaning taxes). An obligation of politicians to be accountable. At the same time there are few obligations versus family as a unit. On the other hand these obligations are strong and clear in Italy. It is an obligation to take care of the family - sometimes against the state as well.

Good or bad?:

While there are many excellent aspects of the individualistic concept, there are also many negative consequences. I will not write much about the positive, as usually Norway is described as "best country to live in" etc. etc. The negatives, however, are worth pointing out. Often these are either neglected, not seen as part of the whole structure or culture, or simply dismissed as individual choice. I will name a few without going into detail - and they all come from the deterioration of family as a concept as I see it:

• rising divorce rates
• children outside marriage/couple structures (mum and dad concepts disappear or change)
• social interaction
• obligations towards other people (not structures)
• loneliness amongst elderly people not taken care of by their family (instead obligation of state)
• abortion as a solution to free sex
• hardship when falling outside society (drug addicts f. ex.)

Now, what does all this mean? It probably we need to revisit our concepts of freedom of choice. What structures are unintentionally broken down which society then cannot rebuild?